I J U S T F E E L E M P T Y A N D  I J U S T F E E L A L O N E .

These days , everything seems not right . Things , people , atmosphere around me . Everything was just not right . Things seems dark . Smiles seems to fade away from my face day by day . Nobody seems care . Hatred was felt by me from everyone . Things not even going well . Everything that I did was always not going well and failed . Harmony ? Is there such a thing ? Long last happiness ? Is there such a thing ? My heart seems can't take it anymore , everything that happened I kept keep it to myself . I can't even tell it to dad or mom or my siblings . I don't want to make them feel worry about me . Mom already carried to many problems , I don't want to add more of her problems . Besties ? Aqilah is the only person that I share my stories with and yeah it really does released my tension feels a bit . But , why did I still feels suffocated ? It's like the most horrible year for me . 18 ? everyone said that it was the most awesome age ever but to me , everything was sucked . Not even one thing seems goes right . I just cried too many times already alone . Yeah , my toilet is the best place for me to cry . It's the best way or I'll feel more suffocate . Sometimes ,I just wish I did not exist in this world . I dont like to be like this , only that one besties of mine knows what's happening and understands what did I feel now . Sometimes , I just feel to break all those glasses and throws all the things that I have and scream loudly till I satisfied . I don't want to be like this . People keeps judging and judging but don't they care about others feelings ? KPOP ? yeah , I love them . what's wrong with it ? Did people knows the reason I love 'em ? You only judge me but you don't know my stories . It's the only thing that can make me laugh when i'm in a sorrow . When I cry , did you even care ? Just let me be , I have my own solution to get my smiles back . I just want to be happy . That's all , leave me alone . And yeah , even if I love KPOP , I did not forget my religion , I still obey Allah's , alhamdullilah :') . I don't get it , can't people just let other people's happy . Anyway , I just post this to release my tension . adios .